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Driving through the Finger Lakes, right smack dab in the middle of them, just a stones throw from the town of Ovid is a town. The sign driving into the town of Middle Finger Lake® says: “Where life is perfect but could always be better”.
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History of Middle Finger Lake

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The story of Middle Finger Lake® goes back to the late 19th century when the majority of the town’s ancestors came over on a sailing ship, called the Agita right after the Civil War. Any of those of you who know what the word agita means lets you know that that should’ve given them some pause, but I digress.

They were primarily southern European farmers and tradespeople not looking to impress anybody and had a history of being exceptionally frugal. This is why they decided to board the boat together and get a group rate.

Being a discount transportation line with a crew that was not all that well seasoned, after a long and arduous journey the boat didn’t end up in New York City but ended up in Bayonne, New Jersey directly across the river.

At this point the future “Middle-Lakians” needed to make a decision. They could go across the river to New York with its shiny allure or get out of New Jersey as quickly as possible, a sentiment pretty much held by everybody who’s ever been to New Jersey.

Having heard Horace Greeley’s advice to “go west young man”. They elected who they thought had the most skills to lead them west. They elected a fella, Isaac Isaac who, incidentally, was the inspiration for the “who’s on first” comedy routine by Abbot and Costello.

Story goes that Mr. Isaac was asked by the immigration man in Bayonne for his name, last name first. He said “ Isaac” . Then he was asked for his first name which he replied “Isaac”. Then the guy says “I had your last name already tell me your first name”. Well we all knows how this goes. So with that Mr. Isaac was sent out for psychological evaluation which in the 1800s much more close to waterboarding than actual care.

Mr. Isaac was eventually released as his wife finally retrieved his birth certificate that was in the lost luggage from the boat.

Mr. Isaac was a frugal farmer by trade and all townspeople looked forward to his leadership in direction and preparation. The only problem was that he was a little too frugal. Bayonne was not a place well known for having many stores selling items needed for a long journey. Mr. Isaac took it upon himself that he would go to Bob’s Discount Compass and Used Oats store. For any of those who know what used oats are you know what I’m talking about, but I digress again.

It was April when they all set out for what they thought was due west. They wanted to go to Indiana or California ( this is still a bone of contention to this day ) but they certainly didn’t want to go Northwest to upstate New York.

By September they had enough schlepping around and decided to settle wherever they were. Where they were was smack dab in the idle of the Finger Lakes. They incorporated the Town of Middle Finger Lake® in 1869.

Being a pleasant sort of people and wanting to be encouraging of goodwill, at the first town board meeting a suggestion was made that in the course of the each day each resident townsperson should greet the other with a positive sign of encouragement and it should be different than a handshake. A handshake was all too common.

A tanner named Gunther Spiegel suggested that the number one sign (the index finger) that we all use today would be appropriate as opposed to a handshake. Well, Gunther was voted down for his lack of creativity and it was suggested that the next finger over should be used with we all know is the “middle finger”. It was voted on and adopted.

Nobody thought this one through.

The whole concept had to be revised in what has become to be known as the “Penn Yan debacle”.

You see, Middle Finger Lake's undertaker Charlie McPherson visited the town of Penn Yan to have his wagon repaired and instead of offering a handshake to the blacksmith Charlie offered him the middle finger.

The blacksmith, a naturally quick tempered man, was just off having had an intense argument with his wife that morning. Having no patience he gave Charlie a beating he did not deserve.

So poor old beaten up and bloody Charlie came back and the met with the Middle Finger Lake® town board and that was the first incident of them actually repealing a law.

Middle Finger Lake®

Next episode:
“The History of the First Church of the Middle Finger”
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